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LONG TIME NOT SEE!

laughs out loud.  I so have not kept this thing up.  Wow....I could have not written on this thing in a year if my buddy did not send me a message to remind me that I have an online journal.  yikes.

what's been going on?

well, it's March.  Girl's day was march 3rd, so my family and I celebrated eating good sushi.  yum yum.  I've been meeting new people.  Some of them I can't remeber their names. 

I met a Korean koreign exchange studen and she goes to Hope University right across from my university.  It's good to make a new friend.  She even called me up to say that she'll miss me while she's gone to Santa Barbara.  hehe.  I feel loved.

In case if you're wondering.  I'm still single and loving it.  I have so much freedom and of course I get to just have loads of fun getting to know various people in various walks of their llife.  No real relationship commitments.  It would be nice to share some special moments with someone, but right now I'm just swamped with work, trying to get another degree, and thinking about going out of the country to explore new horizons.  I don't have the money to go to Japan at the moment.  It would be great if I could go see my friend's wedding in Japan and Taiwan, but lately bling bling does more of the talking.

I better send this to people so they know that I actually write on this thing still. laughs.  Oh yeah....My good girl friend went to Florida.  I miss her a lot, but she's getting fit cause of bootcamp.  I'm reminded of her hard efforts as I head out to the gym and jog for at least 45 minutes or more.  I've been swimming as well, but my goggles are worn out.  They get foggy.  BLAH!.  I need to go get a hair cut too, but since a have a upcoming wedding to help out, forget it.  I need semi long hair to even do an updo.  Of course I'll look great, but I still haven't decided whether to buy a spring dress or see if I can manage with the cloths that I have.  I've only known this gal for a year, but she's getting married to her significant other next month.  I'll tell you how it went.  I should start uploading photos on this thing too huh.  Well please remind me.

alright that's my random info for the week.  I'll try to be more consistent.

the last day

The end of July already.  How time flies.  I've had a blast.

My childhood sister, co-woker and boss, and mentor has gotten married this weekend.  She has been in an on and off 8 year relationship with her new husband.  I'm sure they are getting ready to take their hunny moon to Jamaica.

I hope they will continue to grow and mature together as they plan to build their new family in Long Beach. 

I wonder how my wedding will be. 

birthday time

YEAH!

God has the perfect timing of telling you great things at the right moment.

I passed my c-best!  I'm so proud of myself.  Now I need to take the next step and go register myself into the local cities to become a substitute.  I'm not sure how much time I'll have to do that side job, but I know things are moving.

I'll be back in Cal State Fullerton in the end of August.  I'll have both my major and minor completed after that.  During the courses I'll make sure to talk to the professors so that I may receive three recommendation letters to attend my dream school.  I only have a couple of options if I want to get masters and credentials at the same time.  I'm aiming for UCLA.

I had a birthday bash this weekend.  I'm so glad that all of my friends could join me for a night of celebration.  I still have people I want to chill and hang out with, but more one on one.  Yeah, they're special.  My b-day is actually on Tuesday, but I'm gonna be studying, working, and spending time with family.

Oh yeah, bro's moved back home and things have gotten a little hectic, but not too bad lately.  I'm motivated even more to get my own place.  I'm determined to get where I want to go.  There are some things that I need to do for myself and this is one of them.  If I want someone with good character and intelligence, I better prove that I have the brains and the heart to serve my field in the best way that I can.

I know I can get there.  I knew from the day I got UCLA seals instead of Cal State Fullerton seals for my graduation invitations last year.  I don't want to give up.  I know I took the long route to figure out who I want to be and what I want to be.  Through this journey, I've learned to appreciate myself, others, and to believe in the divine that made me. 

I see his fingerprints all over the place.  I've been rescued on the road countless times.  I thought I was gonna die in a car crash, or bust out my engine, or tires, but God has always provided a safe passage for me to get HOME.  I have a purpose to fulfill in this life.  Being a educator is just the one of them.  Bring a wife and a mother is also a promise given from the Lord.  Having the time and financial stability to travel the world is also one of the God's plans for me. 

I believe my own father's words, "you will be a phenomenal individual in the world."  Let me continue to face the light of the path.

I knew this year was gonna be a good year for me.  It's turning out splendidly.  I would like to be with someone too this year, but no rush.  There are still plenty of things to take care of.

May God send me the man that I will bless me and my family.

peace out, suzs

holding back

I just read my friend's post it on my info page. (xanga style)  I think he knows me very well and yet we've only met a couple of times.  Thanks Toe with a BEE..lol.  He's a sweety.  >_<

He's my muse at times.  The magic lasts long enough to impact my days on Earth.  yup yup.  that's my buddio.  thanks for the inspiration.

funny how one person leads to another.  I guess its a human chain event where one gal leads you to another and then eventually to the opposite sex.  anyway....I met a interesting fellow.  A mid 40 yr. old dating a friend's friend.  yeah...something like that.

both gf and bf might have known my bro back in UC Berkeley days.  yeah...bro is smart.  that i can vouch for.  I've let the bitterness settle in between me and my bro.  it's not healthy.

the fellow had some magic intuition like me.  sees through people's heart.  We both agreed that our mutual friend should not lower her standards by settling with the man she's with right now.  WE know she can make her life the way she wants it to be without the baggage...but then again we all have baggage.

he accurately pointed out mine.  I'm not surprised.  I was more surprised with how open and accepting I've become when someone just critiqued personal emotions.  I guess its something I needed to hear, but already knew.

love thy self.  it seems so simple...and I've been preaching it since the beginning of the year..but I don't think I got anywhere....lol...

baggage..it's weighing me down.  the past hurts only if I make it hurt.  And as Robert Langdon from "The Da Vinci Code" said in the movie, "People don't hate history, they only hate their own.  What happened to you in the past?"

how can I truly LET GO of it?  It's what confines me..and yet has shaped who I've become..

the million dollar answer....

be prepared for the opportunities that arise; so you'll be "lucky" enough to be at the right place at the right time because you followed the trail of the map where X marks the spot.

JUST GO FOR IT.  stop thinking about others, comparing them to yourself, or even doing it for THEM...

DO it for yourself...was this fellow's advice..

and I stared right into his eyes contemplating...that aint such a bad idea...

I'm doing good right now...so what can I do because I'm already feeling good?  awwwww...the infinite possibilities.

I'm not going to settle on life...or relationships...or friends.

why should i? 

phony

Holden from "Catcher of the Rye" has been on my mind for a while.

People are SOOOOOOOO fickle...and as he would say PHONY.

For the past month of May I've been having a hard time writing on this thing, cause I usually want to stay somewhat positive.  I don't want to write anything bad about other peeps, but I've got to tell ya...they're PHONY.

ok..rant for the month.

anywayz....moving along.

I've been meeting new people and people I've only known for less then six months.  Every weekend was packed with activities, mainly affliated with church buddies.  I've been trying to serve at least twice a month.

I've been singing in a praise team again lately back at my home church and making sure to be there for the newby christians.  It's been fun and also....like I said...people can be FICKLE.  sniff sniff.

It's my heart that counts...not what others do to me...I keep on telling myself.

I've been reading the word as much as I can to.  I'm so proud of myself.  I finished Genesis and John in May.  Now I'm working on Matthew and Exodus.  Fun Fun Fun.

I'm taking the C-Best this month...taking care of finacial debt stuff from college..and smiling.

I believe that there's a better day out there.  I know I can't GET OUT of my troubles, but I know that God GETS IN to perform his blessings and miracles.  SEE I told you I can't stay gloomy and negative for long.  BEAMS.